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Paige Balan

Humanastorian
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Paige Balan last won the day on May 11

Paige Balan had the most liked content!

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About Paige Balan

  • Rank
    Apprentice
  • Birthday 03/15/1995

Profile Information

  • Nickname
    Paige
  • Gender
    Female
  • Location
    Oklahoma
  • Interests
    Crochet, Vikings, mythology

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  1. Paige Balan

    Trying

    I'm trying to be a better person. I ended last year being a bitter, crabby, resentful person. I woke up pissed off, ate lunch pissed off, went to bed pissed off, repeated. Day in and day out. Today I decided that I can't keep living in anger and annoyance all the time. It really is exhausting being irked by every single little thing, and then the anger only keeps me awake at night. I'm already exhausted enough from dealing with general insomnia. Do I really need to add to it? It may take some getting used to on my end, but I'm trying. There's no point in getting irrationally upset at things that can't be controlled or aren't going to change. I'm not saying I'll be perfect at this new mindset, but I can at least try.
  2. Now that most of the holidays are over and many of us have gifted handmade items, I've found myself in a bit of a negative thought cycle about recipients pretending to appreciate the work and love that goes into the items. I do handmade gifts because I've been unemployed since April and can't afford other material things to gift, so I make things for others instead. I also feel like something I've created is a more meaningful gift than something off the shelf at the store. But I've found that a couple of my family members don't care for something handmade. My sibling is the worst of the bunch, and is particularly impossible to buy for due to ever-changing interests that I can't keep up with because it's a new thing every week. I presume everyone here has dealt with this, so my question is: how do you personally handle it?
  3. Honestly, I didn't learn from a book. I am a visual learner, so I have to see how something is done to understand what I'm doing. I learned from YouTube. However, any of the Stitch Bibles would work because once you learn a few stitches, basic or otherwise, you can arrange them however you see fit.
  4. I know this thread is a couple months old, but I figured my first post could be on this thread anyway because I'm brand new and have to start somewhere lol. I was raised in a household where my mom was very open about things, and she prayed to both God as Christians know Him as well as other pagan deities. She allowed me to form my own opinions on religion and God from a young age. I remember when I was very young and my little brother was going through chemo, we would recite Now I Lay Me Down to Sleep. I stopped after a few years, probably because I didn't really understand what exactly i was doing. I was never baptised into the LDS faith of my dad's family. In 2011 or 2012, I stopped believing in God when my dog got sick. I prayed for days that he would love until my dad got home from his hunting trip, and he tried to make it. My dog was a fighter even though he was in pain and his organs were failing from a vet tech's careless mistake (a full double dose of the rabies vaccine is what we believe took my sweet boy, because he was only 7 and otherwise fairly healthy with at least a few good years left in him). He didn't make it until my dad got back. The hunting trip was cut short and we had my sweet boy cremated but never saw the ashes. It was right after Christmas that he passed, December 28th. I was furious with God and I walked away. I eventually found other gods/esses and most of them didn't work out for me either. A few got me through some rough patches, then told me I didn't need their help any more. I have devoted myself to Thor and the Universe, and it is them that I pray to. I've always believed that there is something larger than we humans, but to me the Big Man in the Sky wasn't that. At least not for me. I've spent my life as a spiritual person, but not religious as most people define the term. (This is the only picture I have of my dog. For some reason, he was really happy wearing bras.)
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